Friday, July 8, 2005

Here you go, you ungrateful little...

Yesterday I turned on not one but two Rockies games during the seventh inning, one of which must have been a replay. Sweet. Since the Captain pointed out that he has a hard time following Denver sports from out of town, I'll just go over recent happenings and then worry about baseball next week. And yes, I promise not to mention the Yankees and Rogers in detailed fashion.

Rockies: The Rockies did win yesterday's actual game 8-5, thanks in large part to two home runs from Todd Helton, who's actually not having much of a season. By his standards, it's horrific: .281, nine homers, and 38 runs-batted-ins. A recent Denver Post story suggested his struggles might be related to lingering resentment over comments made by broadcaster Wayne Hagin, who maybe sort of suggested that Helton was on steroids. If that's the actual cause, Helton might be the most easily distracted athlete of all-time. That's just weak, and I doubt that's it.

Tough to determine what the actual cause is, though, as he's maintained his plate discipline (which has led to a still-healthy .404 OBP) and I refuse to believe he was ever actually on steroids. Even if I had watched all the games I wouldn't be able to pick up something like "He's not turning on the slider like he used to", which I suspect scouts make up half the time anyway. So who knows.

He's had six straight gold-plated seasons and I don't have the heart to rip the guy. However, his slump has cleared a spot on the All-Star team for reliever Brian Fuentes, who has posted a 2.48 ERA in a scant 40 innings. Not that forty innings is particularly small for a reliever, I just think it's funny that our best performer this year is a guy who has been on the field for not even five full games and, therefore, has had little chance to embarass himself. It's certainly fitting for this year's team.

Unfortunately, Fuentes has become the poster guy for the whole, "Can you believe that stupid rule that means every team gets an All-Star? It's an absolute crime that he's on the team ahead of Morgan Ensberg." Why these people care so much about the integrity of an exhibition game is beyond me. Baseball doesn't seem to tolerate casual fans; just one of the many reasons it's losing ground.

Broncos: Well, today's Denver Post sports section had a thrilling account of the return of Quentin "Q" Griffin, who still thinks he's got a shot to start at tailback. Which is endearing, in a way.

Also, Danny Kanell took a pay cut from $1 million to $350,000 so he could stay with the Broncos. That's sweet, though it's hard to imagine any other team would gainfully employ him, especially at No.2, so it's not as selfless as when Elway was the league's lowest-paid starting Q (in contrast to, I don't know, everyone's favorite pretty boy, Peyton Manning!).

Safety Sam Brandon, who wears No. 42 to honor his spot as the forty-second straight safety drafted by Denver to be compared favorably Steve Atwater and fall miserably short, was arrested Monday, so that's news, too.

Really, the closest thing to a battle so far is between new punter Todd Sauerbrun and draftee Paul Edinger, who will probably end up as a kickoff specialist anyway. However, when someone in camp starts turning heads in the proud tradition of guys like Darius Watts, Dorsett Davis and Brian Griese, I'll let you know.

Nuggets: Nuggets rookies looked solid in yesterday's opening summer-league game. Julius Hodge had 13 points. Ricky Sanchez scored twice from the outside, including a three-pointer. Always good to see your near seven-footers stepping out beyond the arc after being physically manhandled by the likes of Jelani McCoy, who has been in the league way too long to have to play in the summer. Yeah, he'll develop, New Jersey, smart move.

Put aside those fears about Linas Kleiza not being athletic enough to run in the Association: he finished with just seven fouls. Yes, seven, I guess you can't foul out in the summer.

"Front" Axel Hervelle did not play.

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

mike... this was a goldmine of quips. well done

first, i want to address the issue regarding helton on steroids. i have the best, and most glaring rebuttal to anyone who makes that claim:

helton's physique is that of a 15 year old sophomore girl, shooting guard to boot.

he's TINY. stick boy. That's always been one of the great things about him, despite his birdlike carriage, he's so fundamentally sound that he just produces.

yes, he's having a down year, but having some experience with the game, and knowing what a perfectionist todd is, i doubt he'd have a "slump" just to spite a newscaster.

i was as surprised as you were to see the nascent hype about Q. he's got mediocre and bench written all over him.. poor guy, he was being talked about like he was the next barry sanders. and considering barry sanders talent is just so abundant these days, we can see how we was destined for greatness and no let down whatsoever.

good work mikey

Mike said...

I didn't mean it like that...the Post made it sound like he was so disturbed by what Hagin had said that he couldn't focus when he hits, which is beyond absurd.

Helton is quite small for a first baseman; I agree, no way he was ever on the juice. Obviously I don't know the man personally, but he also doesn't seem like the kind of guy who'd cheat-as opposed to the guys who have been caught.

I laughed when I read your comment about the abundance of Sanders-like talent. I really hate how the local media give Shanahan such a free pass on his personnel decisions. Not that we shouldn't have drafted Q specifically or anything, I just think it's ridiculous how they act like a freaking PR wing for every decision coming out of Dove Valley. That's probably why following the Broncos has been such a letdown the last few years; I probably buy into some of that hype that we're a lot more loaded than we are. Well, I'll be shooting straight when the time comes.

Anonymous said...

interesting point to consider.

why do the denver media feel such an obligation to stick up for/pander to shanahan?

two reasons.
1. in d-town, (denver PR 101) you burn your source once, you suddenly find yourself without access to the the big dog. you become relegated to asking the assistant water boy what flavor gatorade shan likes. He's the ultimate source for info, and as such, he understands the power of his position. he doesn't have to do your show, do your an interview for your station, etc. So the media would rather massage his ego than lose access. This is because...

2. those who are for are greater than those who are against. the broncos rule denver, and garner more unquestioning, unfaltering support than a GOP rally in colorado springs. IE, by and large, most bronco's fans don't want to hear the negative. they see the world through tangerine-colored lenses... and they are a thick prescription for myopia of epic proportions. every draft pick, every trade, is spun, and the broncos faithful swallow the whole bit. it's much easier for them this way.

a small % ... have become skeptical of shanahan a long time ago, and are willing to admit when their party, i mean their team... made unwise choices.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like Cheney is guilty of Obstruction of Justice to me...

Find out for yourselves at www.democraticunderground.com ,
the article is titled, "RNC Statement Shows Cheney Lied, May Be Guilty of Obstructing Justice"

How do you like dem apples you freedom destroying pigs? I don't know why y'all are anti human rights, but I like freedom, even if you ladies don't.

Anonymous said...

alexis... they are reconvening at your elite "start your own street kiosk/sunglass hut" seminar... go back to pestering them with your questions on "how do i ring up credit card sale?"

let the adults speak please.

obviously you have nothing to contribute... you give real dems (ME) a bad name.

john, i totally agree on mike s. being a complete career opportunist. i don't think many coaches could've screwed up what the broncos already had in place. the greatest QB in the game, ever. The best RB in the game, at the time. And the greatest TE ever. As much as I hate seeing/hearing shannon sharpe over enunciate... he completely revolutionized the position. Impossible to guard, he was the duke's bread and butter, and quite a potent brand of parkay if i do say so myself.

so the question is, when is his honey moon over? I mean.. back to back super bowl's is a pretty damn good feat... but not winning another playoff game since that point? Come on.

I think shanny is much like other political actors, those in power tend to want to accumulate more power in order to preserve their longevity. As he centralizes the organization around him, it becomes harder for him to be removed. Many know of the love-affair he and bowlen share, making him damned near impossible to supplant.

i think (unfortunately) we'd see shanny retire before he was fired. As a result of his pride, perhaps that's his achilles heel?

Anonymous said...

Well pugs, so you're one of those Southern Democrats, ehhh? Support your party whenever it's convenient? It's Democrats like you and Zoe Miller that give our party a bad name, because you guys can't make up your minds.

Mike said...

Who's Zoe Miller?

Anonymous said...

ha ha... zoe miller.

i have no idea who that is.

alexis... as my cohorts can attest... i'm much more of a democrat that you buddy. and fyi, when crafting an argument, it's usually good to cite neutral sources to gain credibility.

but you wouldn't know much about that would you.

and colorado isn't in the south, so i guess i don't really qualify as one of those either.

why do you even bother... you are such an arrogant fool.

but please, keep coming back. we love making fun of you.

Anonymous said...

*Zell Miller, my bad. Arrogant fool? Well at least I'm not afraid to admit my mistakes.

Anonymous said...

And at least I don't refer to myself as a game that originated from old milkcaps, and is now featuring such annoying characters as Pickachu from Pokemon.

Anonymous said...

alexis,

first off... that's POGS.

second... ever heard of an inside joke?

probably not, because you've never been "in" on a joke with someone because you don't have enough friends, nor a sense of humor that would warrant inclusive comedic experiences.

Mike said...

Who's Pickachu?

(Yes, I picked that up right away, and yes, I know I shouldn't admit that in a public forum.)

The pogs joke was funny the first time, even if it was completely ripped off from The Simpsons, but now it's weaker than both your legal arguments and Rip's nose cartilage.

Mike said...

As for Shanahan, I think he's at least a very good coach, but his personnel decisions have left a lot to be desired. He put together quite a bit of those Super Bowl teams, and enjoyed a legendary streak of luck with his lesser-known pickups-guys like TD, Rod Smith, Eddie Mac, Bill Romanowski all turned into Pro Bowl-level performers.

Clearly a touch which has departed him.

The only problem with firing Shanahan for the sake of firing Shanahan is that there are no coaches better available. Better coaches definitely exist, but they have jobs. Don't kid yourselves; no one in the unemployment line or in college would even come close to Shanahan's level of performance. OK, probably someone could-but who would that be?

I think Pugs is right; Bowlen has said on several occasions that Sham-nahan is here as long as he wants to be.

All I will attest-Pugs is quite the Democrat. Sadly for your arguments, Alex, he's an educated one.

Anonymous said...

and the defense rests your honor

Anonymous said...

I like men... a lot

Mike said...

Ladies and gentlemen, the comedic stylings of Mister Alex Sudreth!

By the way, I think I'm the only one who will ever see that, you moron...maybe next time you'll comment on a recent post?