Hole Punch Sports

A lot has happened since I last blogged. Here are my thoughts: 1. The Rockies fired longtime manager Clint Hurdle and replaced him with Jim Tracy, who used to manage the Dodgers, who suck, and the Pirates. I don’t know why but I’ve always hated the Dodgers. Anyway, I thought it was a dumb move but the team is 19-7 under Tracy, including an eleven-game winning streak. Last Saturday my ward went to the Rockies game, which I skipped, and which the Rockies won on Todd Helton’s ninth-inning home run. I don’t know why ESPN always starts a friggin’ video whenever you go to their website. With millions of visitors a month that’s gotta be cost-effective. Anyway, I don’t know what it all means; the Dodgers have the best record in baseball and are 9.5 games up on us. But we’re already in wild-card contention. 2. The Cleveland Cavaliers picked up Shaq O’Neal in a trade with the Phoenix Suns, who got a 2010 second-rounder, half a mill, Sasha “Slover” Pavlovic and Ben Wallace, because one ...

Oh, you want me to write about the big game yesterday? Well, I didn’t watch it, unfortunately. But here’s a great recap and some highlights.

The Lakers appear poised to take a 3-1 lead over the Magic, and since I don’t want to pay attention to that, let’s discuss ESPN.com’s ridiculous NBA franchise rankings . I hate this list probably because I like the concept so much; for some reason NBA history has always appealed to me. Last time I played NBA Live, it was some combination of games among the all-time Celtics, all-time Lakers, and the so-unstoppa-Bulls of the late-90s. (I take turns beating the Lakers with either Boston or Chicago.) Anyway, John Hollinger explains most of his typically numbers-heavy decision-making here , if you’re inclined, but I’d rank the teams more with my gut. Before I get into things I disagree with, let me just say how much I LOVE that he put the New York Knicks at No. 14. I hate how the league sucks up to New York and pretends its team is some kind of marquee franchise. Anyway, let’s start at the top. Hollinger puts the Lakers as the No. 1 franchise ever, over the Boston Celtics, since the Lak...

The Orlando Magic won at home last night, cutting the L.A. Lakers’ NBA Finals lead to two games to one. They put up more than a hundred despite not getting much from Hedo down the stretch, and they have the next two games at home. But this is the same team that was blown out in Game One, blew Game Two, and almost lost their lead last night despite Kobe’s fourth-quarter struggles. In other words, I don’t think so.

Twice today I’ve discussed the upcoming NBA Finals with people, both of whom said they hope the Los Angeles Lakers win the series. Why? Because if the Lakers humiliate the Orlando Magic, then that means the Denver Nuggets were the second-best team in the NBA! Golly gee, that’s incredible! I forget, what do they call the trophy they give you for being the second-best team? (As a Broncos fan, I’m pretty sure the NFL calls it the “Lamar Hunt Trophy”, actually.) Why does anyone care about this? The Nuggets are who they are, and what they are is a team not yet good enough to win the NBA championship. I don’t really care for second-place finishes. Seriously, though, I hate the Lakers, and have for years. That doesn’t just change because a Lakers victory might fool the simple-minded into regarding the Nuggets more highly. * * * As you’ve probably heard, LeBron James left after getting eliminated by the Magic without speaking to the media, which I guess wasn’t the most grown-up thing e...